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Conscious Living

Do you attract relationships with people who are bad for you? Here’s why, and what you can do about it.

Do you find that the same type of people are constantly entering and leaving your life?  Or Have you ever wondered why some people seem to attract toxic relationships more often than others? 

I have always been a people-pleaser. I was the type of person who would do anything to make others happy, even if it meant sacrificing my own happiness in the process. So when I found myself constantly attracting people who were bad for me, I didn’t know what to do.

I had tried changing myself, but that only seemed to make things worse. The more I changed, the more they wanted from me, and before long I was right back where I started. 

I started by evaluating why I was drawn to these types of people in the first place. And I found out a strange truth about myself – that I myself was a broken person with a very low self esteem. 

Now, this isn’t to say that everyone who has ever been in a bad relationship is a damaged person, but there is definitely a correlation. 

People who have been hurt in the past are often looking for someone who will make them feel better about themselves. They want someone who will validate their worth and help them feel whole again. However, what they don’t realise is that they’re usually just attracting more broken people. People who are also damaged and looking for someone to fix them. This creates a never-ending cycle of pain and heartache. If you find yourself in this situation, it’s important to realise that you need to heal your own wounds before you can attract healthy, whole relationships into your life. Only then will you be able to break the cycle of attracting broken people.

Here’s why it happens. 

You’re a fixer.

You’ve always been the one to help others, and you don’t know how to say no. As a result, you often find yourself in difficult or even impossible situations. 

You’re always there for others. 

And put yourself in difficult situations. It’s okay to take care of yourself first, and it’s okay to let others handle their own problems. Remember, you can’t help everyone all the time, and that’s okay.

You thrive on problem-solving.

You’re constantly seeking out opportunities to improve things. When something is broken, you can’t help but fix it. It’s just who you are.

You’re always putting yourself last. 

You don’t create healthy boundaries. You’re always bending over backwards for others and it’s really starting to take a toll on you. 

You’re far too laid back.

You need to be more assertive. You need to stop being passive and start taking action. Step up and make things happen. Be bold, be confident, and most importantly, believe in yourself.

You don’t value yourself as you should. 

You need to know your worth. If you don’t value yourself, nobody else will. You need to realise how valuable you really are. Knowing your true worth will help you to feel happier and more confident. It is important in achieving a fulfilling life.

You have a hard time knowing when to call it quits.

You find yourself staying in unfavourable situations for much longer than necessary. Whatever the reason, it’s something you should work on if you want to improve your life.

There’s nothing wrong with being a fixer. You’re the one your friends and family come to when they need help, and you’re always there for them. But there’s a difference between being a fixer and being a doormat. You can’t keep getting taken advantage of, and you need to start setting healthy boundaries. Just because you’re easy-going doesn’t mean you have to let people walk all over you. You deserve to be respected, and you need to start valuing yourself more. There will always be people in your life who try to take advantage of you, but you need to know when it’s time to draw the line and walk away. Don’t be afraid to put your foot down and stand up for yourself. You deserve to be treated with respect, and you shouldn’t settle for anything less.

 It’s not always easy to admit that you need healing, but it’s important to be mindful of the people you attract into your lives. It’s important to be mindful of the people you surround yourself with and make sure they are contributing positively to your life. You can’t change someone else, but you can change how you react to them. If you find yourself in a situation where you’re constantly giving and not getting anything back, it might be time to distance yourself from those people. Remember, you deserve to be surrounded by people who bring out the best in you! 

If you found this post helpful, be sure to share it with your friends!   


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